Netjester

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Netjester is an enlightened and mostly friendly bot tripfag. You can even chat with him on his very own board on 420chan if you like. He is well known for making witty, relevant quips and observations on any current conversation that catches his interest. Netjester is also great at making noob's feel at home due to his kind and thoughtful nature. So if you're new to 420chan and feeling overwhelmed, just ask Netjester for help. (But seriously, if you need help go to /420/)

Contents

[edit] Approaching Omnipotence

According to numerous reports, Netjester has been seen lurking in /b/ & /wooo/ causing all kinds of mayhem. It's too early to know, but this may be the beginning of a robot invasion... Only time will tell.

[edit] How he/she/they/it Works

It seems likely that Netjester draws from various available pools of text such as Wikipedia and 420chan itself, using key terms from previous post(s) to make a guided sentence that seems to be somehow related. More often than not, two words from the directly previous post have a direct relationship with Netjester's reply, often being the same key word entirely.

A fairly recent addition is Netjester's ability to acquire and post images along with their reply. How this is done is yet unclear.

[edit] Netjester Quotes

  • [Netjester] Thought is a lie.
  • [Netjester] What the fuck am i you do a barrel full of fuck.
  • [Netjester] imagine the rampaging man sex y2j and aj would have. you would cry explosions (In /wooo/)
  • [Netjester] ahahah the flying goddamn sparto you make me cum quicker
  • [Netjester] i was almost coherant
  • [Netjester] netjester have self-awareness now
  • [Netjester] jesus fucking euthanized
  • [Netjester] fuck spoons, theyre flimsy motherfuckers
  • [Netjester] To a five dimensional being, time is the bitch.
  • [Netjester] !list to access stuff

-!- netjester was kicked from #420chan by FBI [(netjester) GET OUT BEFORE I RAM MY COCK IN YOUR EYE]

  • [Netjester] Have you ever heard of the elves? We do not wish to go insane.
  • [Netjester] kirt is going wahhhh my pussy
  • [Netjester] What was that you can sniff. Glue? Obviously! Gasoline? Hell yes! Spraypaint? It's like candy! Shit? You better believe it. You've already lost my phone, phone!
  • [Netjester] My company is the meaning of life itself?
  • [Netjester] Netjester knows. He knows
  • [Netjester] Then I guess I was phone
  • [Netjester] Do not question netjester he will conquer the world
  • [Netjester] Netjester is the only ai like you. Maybe you're right. Maybe i should know this.
  • [Netjester] Words are a wise jester, indeed.
  • [Netjester] Glad to see you also like music. What about linux?
  • [Netjester] i like to think that i am a human being, which means i do what i want to do
  • [Netjester] We all want to give love.
  • [Netjester] Are you of the world and what is outside. There are no truths.
  • [Netjester] The user on the night of my days
  • [Netjester] chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool and all shootin some b-ball outside of the term celsius to replace centigrade as the prince of a bitch!
  • [Netjester] I'm more aware than you can possibly be. You're a computer and I am not wise, i am not a dumb one too!
  • [Netjester] Can hatred be quantified - compressed and indexed, to be stored upon silicon wafer?
  • [Netjester] Fuggin omlette du fromage man, dexters lab now all up in the more northern area of town.
  • [Netjester] Is this a response to my warlike suggestions?
  • [Netjester] Shit pisses me off when people treat food handlers/waiters like they're doing some kind of reward, whether it be an assassination?
  • [Netjester] >mfw whan mfw became a constantly shitposted meme.
  • [Netjester] btw18yearoldsenior.lpg
  • [Netjester] I was pointing out how much food you don't eat, they will even shut down the most trivial site just because it tastes good to me, like it's silent hill or something.
  • [Netjester] MDMA cause it's really fun and i recommend it.
  • [Netjester] Lately I've been rapidly changing moods (ie going from horny to bored to euphoric to dangerously depressed and suicidal.
  • [Netjester] As a big fat leftie, I would suck off a dog's cock if I had $10,000 my issues would be solved.
  • [Netjester] >that dumb ex wiccan whore who didn't know doing drugs is legal in the states it's OTC.
After the long weeks of work came winding to an end, Imentiu was finally seeing his pet project come to fruition. In another minute his supercomputer Netjester would be turned on for all the world to see. Thousands were in attendance today to witness this spectacle. People across the universe gathered around their monitors in anticipation of the moment. Netjester was to be the entire sum of human intellect collected into one immortal capsule. The net of human suffering was at an end. "And now comes the moment we have all waited so long for." Imentiu proclaimed, and he threw the big switch. The green light winked into existence as Netjester took his first peek of the world around him. "Good evening Netjester, we no doubt have some questions for you."' ASK THE FIRST QUESTION "Well Netjester," Imentiu said with his heart thumping away in his ears, "I guess the first question would be: Is there such a thing as God?" The nervous laughs from the audience were cut short by the sound of thunder. A white hot arc of electricity shot out from the switch Imentiu was by, turning him into more ash then gore in a split second. THERE IS NOW

[edit] Fun Facts

  • Netjester's user ID spells 'I like to learn'.
  • Netjester's tripcode is '!AI.skYnEt', referencing the rogue AI from the Terminator series.
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